Here's my pitch!
Reflection:
So some of the feedback I received mentioned how I was not as enthusiastic about my business plan and did not seem engaged. I was sitting down too so that probably took away from the significance of what I had to say. I did include pricing options in my second pitch and provided a more specific description on the content and service I would provide, so at least that was an improvement.
Changes:
Based on the feedback I received, I did my best to try to stay engaged in this pitch. I used substantially a lot more hand gestures and I believe the inflection in my voice incited more enthusiasm in my subject matter. My background was more neutral too and I happened to be standing up, which should help with audience attention (hopefully). I still struggle with memorizing my pitch a bit, I had to read a good portion of it off the computer but what can I say it's a work in progress.
I had almost the exact same experience as you in the third elevator pitch. My feedback from part 2 was the same, to be more enthusiastic during my pitch. I tried to improve on this by also using more hand gestures and changing the tone of my voice. I think you did a great job improving on this aspect of your pitch! It makes a huge difference standing up and using hand motions.
ReplyDeleteHey Roksolana,
ReplyDeleteI like that you actually listened to your feedback and decided to make some changes. I am not going to like though; some feedback is not always the best. I think your vocal projection was much better but now instead of not enough gestures there was way too much hand movement. It was almost a little distracting if I may say. This did seem much more professional and enthusiastic to your previous speeches.
Hi Roksolana,
ReplyDeleteI think the feedback you took into consideration and changed in this elevator pitch was spot on. Being engaging throughout the pitch can be a challenge especially when you are trying to hit so many points in such a short period of time, but I do see your enthusiasm in this pitch and it makes it a lot more intriguing! I also struggled with the memorization factor as it was hard for me to sound rehearsed/prepared but still personable and engaged as well. Good post!
Hey Roksolana! It was nice to see that you made the changes to the elevator pitch from the last comments. I do agree with Arman though, it did feel like there was an excessive amount of hand movement but its easier to take away than add. It felt professional and it got right to the point. I had issues with memorizing mine as well but I came up with an idea. Instead of memorizing everything, I found it is better to memorize the topics to touch on. This way it can still be structured but not too structured where it feels forced.
ReplyDelete